I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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