Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
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