another moral hangover. fuck.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
