its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
