she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize
