I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
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