you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Randomize
