did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Randomize