that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
it's like iHOP with fire
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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