Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
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