I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize
