She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I want a musical about memes.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
