I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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