I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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