Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize
