Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize
