yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
