That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Randomize
