Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
