I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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