If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
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