...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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