i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
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