I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
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