Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
She's the barista slut.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
