I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Randomize
