Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Randomize
