what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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