is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Randomize