i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Randomize