fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
