Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
