fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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