This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
