Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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