We're facebook friends in real life
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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