...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
