you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
