why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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