Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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