just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
