His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize
