I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
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