i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Randomize
