On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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