How'd it feel making her break her religion?
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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