You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
