Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
