I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize