so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize
