And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
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