How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
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