Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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